Friday, December 2, 2011

Criticize my writing please?

Question by lawlman91: Criticize my writing please?
The golden and high palace walls watched over the Prince who strode across the red carpet, approaching the king.

"Yes, father?" the prince knelt before the king.

Sternly, the king declared, "Lead the Trident."

The prince's eyes widened with worry, "W-why?"

"Why?!" the king snapped, "You dare question orders?!"

"The Trident is a suicide mission, father."

The king remarked, "It is not."

The prince bottled rage, "By what statistics, father? We'll be outnumbered four-to-one. Why does the Trident even exist in the first place?"

"Listen to me," the king reassured, "You'll be all right, Stan. Gonza will assist you"

A tear rolled down Stan's face as he recognized the authority of the order, and the inevitability of dying with the all-out attack force, the Trident. He also recognized his own inability to lead, pra quality that had haunted him since adolescent awareness.

He had worried about becoming king in a few years because of his poor leadership. Now, he was immediately called to lead.

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